


Pretty Boys

by Vav



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-12 04:39:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5652784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vav/pseuds/Vav
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Matt and Joel don't have dates to the wedding. Joel kinda likes Matt's face, and doesn't think a face like that should go to a wedding without a date. He's doing everyone a service, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretty Boys

**Author's Note:**

> Holy hell I cranked this one out 2fast2furious. It's also a lot longer than I intended; sorry bout it!! But let me know what y'all think; I hope you like it!

Everyone else had a date. Why didn’t he have a date? James had Elyse, Lawrence had Adam, Sean and Bruce had their respective significant others. It wasn’t fair. He would have to show up to their old coworker’s wedding without a hand to hold or hips to grab while slow dancing. And that just wouldn’t do.

He was the first one in the office on Monday morning for some reason. Usually Bruce was present, alert, and setting everything up for the day. But today it was Joel. He didn’t quite know what to do while his computer booted up, so he wandered around the room and aimlessly checked up on all his social media accounts, even though he had already done so while laying in bed earlier. He found an article to read, and took a seat in Matt’s desk chair without even thinking about it.

“Morning,” a tired voice mumbled from around the corner, by the door. Joel couldn’t see the person, but knew who it was. They all had their different entrances, most of them silent, but Matt _always_ had a greeting prepared for whoever was waiting. Usually Bruce. And he was probably expecting Bruce, too, based on the confusion on his face when he found Joel at his desk.

“Good morning, Matt!” Joel replied enthusiastically. He pocketed his phone as best as he could and beamed up at the bearded man. “Sorry, I got tired of standing.” He rose from the chair and moved out of the way, back to his own workspace. 

“Oh, no, it’s fine. Where’s Bruce?”

“Hell if I know. He’ll probably be here soon,” Joel shrugged. Matt nodded and took to getting settled in for the day. It was silent for a whole ninety seconds before Joel opened his mouth again. “Hey, do you have a date to the wedding on Saturday?”

“No, I’m going by myself,” Matt answered without making eye contact. He was preoccupied with getting his snack and water bottle out of his backpack. Joel pursed his lips and nodded to himself. Matt didn’t have a date. Joel didn’t have a date. Matt was a strapping young man. Joel liked to say the same about himself. They would look good side by side, right? It took Joel a few more seconds to muster up the courage.

“Well, I’m in the same boat,” Joel started, speaking as evenly as possible. “Would you happen to want to go together?” Now Matt looked up. Joel had his eyebrows raised, head tilted downward, and his thumbs hooked on his belt loops.

“Like, as a date? Or just friends?”

“That’d be up to you, just so long as everyone _thinks_ it’s a date,” Joel stated with a wink. Almost a blink. Joel wasn’t the best at winking, okay? Matt felt his face heat up. He had to answer now, couldn’t keep Joel waiting. Was this Joel’s way of finding out if Matt had a crush on him or not? Because this was _not_ the right time for _that_ information to come out. 

Joel hoped he’d agree. He had this _thing_ about going to weddings alone. It was like a faux pas to him. And having a man like Matt Peake on his arm in front of all their old and current coworkers seemed like a dream. Joel hoped the question he kinda pulled out of his ass didn’t reveal anything, or make him seem too desperate. Because he liked Matt. A lot. A bunch. A shit ton. But Matt liked to kiss pretty girls and that was okay.

“Yeah, I’ll go with you,” Matt affirmed. “Nothing worse than showing up to a wedding alone, right?”

-

“Are you okay with hand-holding?”

There was a reason Joel had asked Matt and only Matt to go to lunch with him on Wednesday. He had to turn down pouty faces from James and Adam in order to get a few minutes alone with his ~date~. The second Matt shut the passenger side door, Joel launched into a series of questions. Most of them were about boundaries, and some were just about getting to and from the wedding and what they should wear.

Matt gave short answers. Joel would have stopped asking him questions in a normal situation, but he really needed to know what the man was comfortable with. He’d make it up to Matt by paying for his lunch, but he needed cold, hard answers. And, he supposed, Matt was giving them to him. With a straight face. He hoped that Matt knew they didn’t _have to_ do this.

Matt gave short answers because anything more might have told Joel that he was _so totally and completely down for this_. He was excited, and not a lot of things excited Matt anymore. He’d seen and done it all already. Now was the normal part of his life, where he worked 9-5 and had just a few close friends and went to parties every now and again. But this wasn’t normal. Matt was going to spend an evening pretending to be Joel Rubin’s boyfriend, and that was something special, albeit a little strange.

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Matt responded with the same tone he’d been using throughout the entire interrogation. Joel checked his mirrors, and Matt checked Joel’s hands on the steering wheel. Just to see what he was in for, of course.

“And, like, if people ask us?” Joel prompted. Matt frowned and raised his brow, shaking his head in an ‘ _I don’t know_ ’ fashion. “Just a date? Or dating? You pick.” _Fuck_. Well, now Matt had to think about other peoples’ opinions. He didn’t like doing that. It kinda scared him. But he knew he’d have Joel at his side to guide him through any tough conversation with strangers or _even people they’d both known for years_.

“Dating,” Matt decided. Play it cool, Matthew. This is a strategy. It’s about logic, not your feelings. “I think it’d pull better reactions.” The statement came with a shrug. “But either is fine with me.” _Nailed it_. Smooth. Crisp. Clean.

“Dating sounds fine to me.”

-

Joel had goddamn _butterflies_ in his stomach when he pulled up to the curb outside Matt’s apartment complex. He wasn’t sure if it was from excitement, or from the idea of something going wrong and wrecking their entire friendship. A mixture of both, he decided when he got the ‘heading downstairs’ text from Matt. Joel got out of his car and walked around it to open the passenger door for his date. _His fake date_.

As always, Matt’s appearance blew Joel’s mind. The guy was wearing a _bow tie_ with his deep maroon dress shirt and black suit. Tailored suit. They were tailored suit twins, ready to show up to this wedding looking gay as hell. Joel’s suit worked for him because he was so slender, but Matt’s suit worked on a whole new level. 

“Hey, handsome,” Joel greeted, leaning against his car. Be cool. Be calm. Be collected, Joel. He had sunglasses on, so _hopefully_ Matt didn’t notice Joel’s eyes wandering up and down as he walked closer. “Looking spiffy.” Spiffy, Joel? _Really?_

“Oh, thanks,” Matt said. He ducked his head and looked up at Joel from under his eyelashes. “You look great.” Joel tilted his head and smiled. He took his sunglasses off and stepped up onto the curb in front of Matt. With a squint, he inspected Matt’s bow tie. Blue and black plaid. Joel gave it a flick before motioning to the opened car door.

“Hop in, sailor!”

Joel looked more than great, Matt thought. But saying anything more would be crossing a line. They had agreed to flashy compliments when the presence of others, but it was just the two of them. No need to put on a show, even if the show would be called ‘honesty.’ Joel’s curls were gelled to perfection and Matt just wanted to _undo_ them. That would _definitely_ cross a line.

“I hope you’re ready to slow dance later,” Joel teased about halfway through the drive. They’d hit traffic, as expected, and had just been shooting the shit. 

“I’m really bad at dancing,” Matt replied flatly.

“Well, you’re lucky that you have me as a partner,” Joel smirked. “I’ll lead. It’ll be fun.” Matt sighed in the passenger seat, hiding his smile with his hand as nonchalantly as he could. Joel noticed how his eyes crinkled, but he decided not to call him out on it.

“Anything for you, dear,” Matt joked. Joel laughed at that, but something didn’t quite settle right once he was done chuckling. Maybe it was how natural that sounded. He kept a straight face, though. For the rest of the ride, as they conversed, he reminded himself that Matt liked to kiss pretty girls and that was okay.

They got to the wedding on time. It was beautiful and people cried and there were flowers that irritated Matt’s eyes. Just as most weddings went. Nobody really noticed that Joel and Matt were there _together_. No, that revelation would happen for everybody at the reception across town. Which meant getting back in the car and driving for twenty anxiety-ridden minutes.

“Still good with this whole thing?” Joel asked for clarification. Matt offered to drive to the reception, considering they’d be needing a taxi home, so he’d have no other time to take his turn on the road. This gave Joel a chance to admire him in the setting sunlight.

“Still good,” Matt nodded. “If _you_ are, that is.” 

“Course,” Joel assured him. “Can’t wait to get drunk and mack on you some.” Matt blew air out of his nose and shook his head in amusement. “Kidding, kidding.” No, Matt didn’t _want_ him to be kidding. Matt was eager to touch his skin and get him drinks and listen to him as he told others about their fake backstory and maybe, hopefully, get a kiss on the cheek by the end of the night. But Joel just wanted an arm to be linked to so he wouldn’t feel so lonely. That was okay, too, Matt supposed.

-

“What’s that?” Lawrence asked Adam under his breath. They had beat Matt and Joel to the reception hall by about two minutes, and had just taken their seats at their table. Lawrence nodded at the pair as they walked toward them.

“What?” Adam returned, but his eyes widened when he saw the two. They were walking casually enough, but what _wasn’t_ so casual were their hands, in the sense that Matt was holding Joel’s and Joel was holding Matt’s. “Oh, shit.” He sounded surprised more than anything else.

They’d already had a quick conversation with three of their old coworkers upon entering the building, but Matt dropped Joel’s hand the second the greetings started. It was out of nervousness, and he apologized afterward. Joel shushed him and suggested they just stay low key until Matt felt okay again, but was answered with Matt’s fingers laced between his again.

“Hello, boys!” Joel shouted too loudly over the soft music that was playing as everyone filed in. He garnered a few glances from other tables, but he didn’t care. “How’d you like the wedding?” Joel and Matt let go of each other so they could cop some squats next to where Lawrence and Adam were seated.

“Fine,” Lawrence answered shortly, waving off the idiotic question. “What’s this?” Now, he used his hand to motion to the two men that had just joined them. “I didn’t sign off on this.” His face softened with a smile, letting them know that it was all good and he wasn’t actually going to interrogate them. Which was nice. Joel needed a few more minutes to prepare for any questions. They fell into casual conversation about the wedding. But Adam would have his eyes on them all night, that was for sure.

Once the reception hall was filled, dinner and drinks were served, which gave Joel the opportunity to start drinking. The fish was paired with a fine chardonnay, and Matt swore he saw heart eyes on that man’s face when the glass was presented to him. Joel didn’t know when his friends got rich enough to afford the delicious catering ( _and the open bar_ ), but he was glad they did.

Matt got asked if he came to the wedding with anyone has he retreated to the table from the bathroom. It was like the guy had his interrogation ready, and launched straight into it the second they broke from their tight embrace. It had been about a year since they’d seen each other, so the questions were warranted, he supposed.

“Yeah, I’m here with someone,” Matt nodded. The guy raised his brows and willed him to go on. “I’m here with Joel.” His brows rose even higher.

“Holy shit, Joel Rubin?” he asked in disbelief. Matt nodded shyly, but smiled nonetheless. “Hey, good for you, man! How long has _that_ been going on?” Matt froze. They didn’t go over this. _This wasn’t in the script_. So Matt went with the first thing that popped into his head.

“About two months.”

When Matt sat back down, Joel grabbed his bathroom soap-scented hand and gave it a quick smooch. He rubbed a thumb over the spot he kissed, then scooted his chair closer to Matt. He guided the hand back down onto Matt’s thigh, but kept his own on top of it. Across the table, Elyse watched the whole exchange with wide eyes. She wasn’t the only one who noticed, though. James gave them a look, chin tilted down, and Sean was looking around to see if anyone else witnessed it.

They had talked about this moment, in a way. Matt brought up what to do with the people they would have to see at work on Monday. They decided to just play it by ear, and do whatever felt natural. And, obviously, Joel felt that being affectionate toward Matt in front of them was natural.

“Eat it up, fuckboys,” Joel announced to the table. Yeah, he saw them looking. “Hold your questions for the press conference after the show.”

No one had time for questions, because it was time for toasts. And cake. Joel was hungry again, after scarfing down his salmon a bit too quickly. The champagne helped ease the hunger, but he was stoked for sugar on sugar. Matt offered to get him a slice of cake once all the stories and jokes were told. _The gentleman_. That left Joel alone at the table with everybody else’s dates. Which was just Adam, Elyse, and Bruce  & Spoole’s girlfriends. Not too intimidating.

“Alright, Rubin, fess up,” Elyse prompted, leaning back in her chair. She shot Joel a look that was supposed to be threatening, and fiddled with the ends of her curled hair. Joel put his elbows on the table, clasped his hands together, and rested his chin on top of them. He took a deep breath with an excited expression that turned flat once he started speaking.

“It’s for show,” he admitted. He had to. He couldn’t keep doing this to them, because he didn’t like lying to his friends. Lying to acquaintances and not-as-close friends…well, that was okay with him. “We didn’t want to come alone, so we’re fake dating. Just for tonight.”

“That’s both pathetic and adorable,” Adam commented. “Take care of him, okay?”

-

People ate it up. Joel would walk up while Matt was mid-conversation and wrap an arm around his waist and press a kiss into his clothed shoulder. This mainly took place in front of buzzed or drunk women, because they thought it was _adorable_. In front of their old friends, the people they used to share offices with, they kept it subtle, but still made it apparent. It would be pinky fingers linked together, or a ‘here’s your drink, babe,’ or hands around waists.

After the bride and groom’s first dance, the dance floor opened up for everyone, and Joel promised Matt that the first slow song would be _theirs_. Neither of them were drunk. No, not nearly drunk enough. They’d never tell each other, but they both wanted to be completely there for when they danced together. It was inevitable, Matt realized. He didn’t like dancing, but he figured it’d be okay with Joel.

And the second the DJ announced something about ‘slowing things down,’ Joel shot Matt this _look_ that sent a chill down his spine. Matt, surprisingly, was the one to leave his conversation to go join Joel. He was drawn in by Joel’s gaze. Even though Joel had only glanced at him for a second or two before turning back to his friends, Matt was _hooked_ and he wanted Joel to hold him _immediately_ , thank you.

“Wow, someone’s had a change of heart,” Joel commented as Matt pulled him, by the wrist, away from the circle he had been in. “You seem awfully eager to dance with me.”

“Maybe I am,” Matt shot back, raising one brow. Joel wanted to tell him that it wasn’t nice to say things he didn’t mean, but soon enough, they had their own space on the dance floor, and Matt was looking at him expectantly. “You really are gonna have to lead me.” Joel took a deep breath and nodded. 

“Well, we can start like this,” Joel suggested before hesitantly closing the gap between the two with an arm around Matt’s waist. “You do the same.” So Matt did, wrapping an arm around Joel on the same side, so that their hands were free to grasp the other’s. Matt took Joel’s left in his right, and waited for their legs to start working. Joel began, simply swaying back and forth, shifting weight from leg to leg. Matt followed suit.

It was hard to control his breathing. Joel had never been this close to Matt before, and even though their bodies weren’t pressed against one another like most of the other couples, it felt so intimate and sweet and _right_?

Matt couldn’t focus. The music was too loud and the lights kept flashing in his eyes and Joel smelled _so good_ and he became all too self-conscious about how his body was functioning. He worried that he was too stiff or his hand was too sweaty or his grip around Joel’s waist was too tight or not tight enough. So he tried to lighten the mood with a joke. He leaned in to mumble something into Joel’s ear

“I think this is how my grandparents dance,” Matt teased. He pulled back and his cheeks heated up even more at this new look that Joel gave him. Brows narrowed, eyes boring into his, mischievous smile playing at his lips. It made Matt’s mouth go dry, and he could have kissed him right then and there, but that wouldn’t have been okay. Joel liked to kiss pretty boys. Matt wasn’t a pretty boy.

“Alright, if you insist,” Joel shrugged. Joel guided Matt’s arms up and around his neck, then placed his own hands down on Matt’s hips. They were too close now. Matt didn’t know what to do, but Joel came to the rescue. With his forehead. Well, there they were. Swaying on the dance floor to some slow love song with their arms around each other and foreheads pressed together.

“Hey, Larr?” Adam nudged his boyfriend. They were positioned at the edge of the dance floor, waiting for a faster song. They didn’t slow dance. It wasn’t their thing. Lawrence hummed in response and tried to follow where Adam’s gaze was leading him. “Does that look fake to you?”

“What, Joel and Matt?” he asked, and Adam nodded. “Maybe they’re just _really_ good actors.” Lawrence raised his brows once Adam turned to face him, and they both took sips of their drinks, in a ‘that’s none of my business’ fashion.

Matt got his kiss on the cheek once the song ended. It was slow, it lingered, and Matt felt it on his face for the rest of the night. Joel immediately left to get a drink and think about what he just did. That’s what couples did, right? He was playing the part. But he couldn’t help but want to give Matt _more_. He wanted to push him against the wall and kiss his parted lips and feel his beard scratching his cheeks. But that wasn’t cool.

It only took a few more drinks for Joel to start dancing all over everybody, including Matt Peake. Matt loosened up quite a bit, as well, and just kinda let it happen. Joel’s hips were everywhere, and Matt let himself touch as much as he wanted. He mainly had his chest pressed into Joel’s back, letting the taller man sway and roll and grind as much as he wanted. One night of fun, he told himself, then it was back to pining over the man who always dressed too formally and spoke too kindly to him and _looked too good all the time_.

But it was too much. It became too much when Joel turned to face him and clasped his hands behind his neck and continued with his hips. Because Matt enjoyed it. Matt loved it and never wanted to stop dancing with Joel, or letting Joel dance around him while he watched and held. He excused himself to the bathroom, then went outside instead of to the dance floor once he was finished.

“Tired of dancing?” Joel came up behind him and asked. It scared Matt a little, mostly because he thought he’d have a good ten minutes away from Joel before he went back inside. “I was looking for you.” 

“Sorry, I just,” Matt started, shaking his head. “Needed some air.” It was slightly chilly outside without his suit jacket, but he didn’t mind the breeze. Joel didn’t seem to mind, either. There wasn’t much outside, just a veranda with a few small tables, and string lights to illuminate the area. There were just a few people drinking at a table, leaving Matt and Joel alone at the opposite end, along the fence.

“No need to apologize,” Joel shrugged. He put his hand on one of Matt’s forearms and gave him a soft smile, which Matt returned before remembering why he actually came outside in the first place.

“Joel, I think I might go home.”

“Oh, okay, I can call a cab and we can-”

“No, like, go home alone,” Matt explained solemnly. “I’ve had fun, and it’s great to see all these people, but…I dunno. This just feels too real.” Joel tilted his head to the side and dropped his hand from Matt’s arm. What was _that_ supposed to mean? Did he not like spending time with Joel? Joel couldn’t really process Matt’s cryptic message, so he had to flat out ask him what he meant.

“Too real?”

“I don’t…I can’t get into it right now,” Matt went on. “It’s just…doing this with you, it-”

“It doesn’t feel so fake anymore,” Joel finished his sentence for him. Lord, he hoped that’s where Matt was going with it, because if not, everything was over. Joel would surely skip Monday at work out of embarrassment. Is embarrassment an illness? Or would he also have to lie his way through a sick day?

When did Joel get so close? Or was this just Matt’s imagination? He didn’t know anymore. Didn’t know anything, really. The only things he knew were that he wanted to be with Joel and he was in way too deep. He had to back off. But…wait, did Joel just say ‘it doesn’t feel so fake anymore?’ Why…why was he aware of _exactly_ how Matt was feeling?

“Yeah,” Matt replied weakly after a few seconds of hesitation. “Yeah, it doesn’t feel so fake anymore. And I think I should go before I do something stupid.” Joel tilted his head the other way, eyes soft. Curious Joel. He really needed to stop looking at Matt like that, otherwise Matt was going to do something _really_ stupid. 

“Sometimes it’s okay to do stupid things,” Joel rationalized. Yeah, okay, he was leading Matt. Egging him on. But he wanted a kiss, dammit. He wanted to kiss his adorable prince charming and go home with him and go on dates with him and hold his hand in public seven days a week. But Matt wanted to kiss pretty girls.

“Not the stupid things I wanna do,” Matt sighed, finally meeting his gaze. Joel’s hand was back on his arm, on his bicep now. He squeezed lightly before he leaned in, and at that point, there was no going back. But he didn’t need to go back, because Matt met him halfway and finally, _finally_ , their lips were together. Both of Joel’s hands made their way to the back of Matt’s neck, and his fingers scratched lightly at the hair there. Matt hummed into the kiss. Joel liked happy Matt.

“Your lips are soft,” Joel mumbled as they paused to breathe. Matt laughed, breathy and sweet, before his hands landed on his favorite place once more: Joel’s hips.

“You taste like bourbon,” Matt countered. Joel smiled at that. “I like it.” Matt was the one to press their lips back together, and they both couldn’t help but smile into the kiss until it was all teeth, and they pulled apart laughing.

“Matt,” Joel whined into the crook of Matt’s neck. They were swaying. There was no music, save for the faint sound of 80s pop coming from inside, but they swayed anyway. Matt grunted in response. “I don’t wanna pretend anymore.”

“I want you to say that when you’re not drunk,” Matt nodded. “I need to know if it’s real. In the morning. Or something. Just…not when you’re drunk.” They were an odd sight. Joel had a few inches on Matt, yet he was the one bent over with his head on Matt’s shoulder. 

“It’s real, Matty,” Joel whined again. The _Matty_ broke Matt’s heart, because he wanted _so badly_ to give in and tell Joel _exactly_ how he felt about him right then and there, but… _he_ needed to be the one talking, not the liquor. They both needed to be sober, with clear heads. Then it’d be perfect. But swaying with Joel wasn’t a bad start. “Come home with me.” Joel’s face was in front of Matt’s yet again.

“What?”

“Come home with me, and I’ll tell you all about it in the morning,” Joel promised, speaking confidently and nodding while he held Matt’s gaze. “I’ll tell you just how _perfect_ you are over breakfast, Matt Peake.”

-

Joel had it worse than Matt in the morning, for sure, but the fact that they woke up next to each other made all the aching and pounding in their heads worth it.

Joel held true to his promise. He made omelettes for the two of them, and sat down at the breakfast nook (yes, Joel had a _breakfast nook_ ) with a content look on his face. Matt was sure that he had forgotten about what he’d said. Forgotten about the kissing, the dancing, the hand holding. 

“I could get used to finding you in my bed every morning, you know,” was the line from Joel that broke the silence. Matt looked up from the piece of omelette that he had just cut for himself. That could have been a joke line. Just a ‘what the hell happened last night?’ line. Matt smirked, not sure of how to reply. “And I don’t quite know what I did to deserve you, but I think we can make this work. Like, do this for real. If you want. That…sounded like what you wanted last night, but I don’t-”

“Yeah,” Matt answered breathlessly. “Yeah, of course, Joel.”

Matt liked to kiss pretty boys like Joel. And that was _fantastic_.


End file.
